Archive | February, 2014

American Horror Story – Coven

7 Feb

In the vast and ever-changing (arguable) world of television, there are two specific types of show: We have the mini series (e.g. Stephen King’s Rose Red), intended to be short and sweet to get across a certain story-line or message created for a certain demographic.  There also exists the continuing series (e.g. Supernatural) that begins strong, sometimes starting with a certain style and theme, and then by the end folds itself into a little ball of repetition that rolls perpetually over plot holes and cliches until careers begin to fail.  (I’m NOT bitter okay?)

Sometimes something beautiful happens, a series begins with the goal in mind to change the characters and story-line season by season all while maintaining a certain theme (e.g. horror).  This style was introduced to appease both kinds of TV watchers.  The mini series enthusiasts can enjoy watching a story that lasts a season and then ends, tidily (I’M TALKING TO YOU SUPERNATURAL) and the long-haulers are sated every single season by being lulled by a feeling of comfort and consistency.

Enter stage left, American Horror Story.


American Horror Story introduced us to a new way of watching GOOD television.  The characters were strong and deserving of our empathy.  I adored the first and second season (Asylum still holding the biggest place in my heart) and Jessica Lange continues to knock it out of the park every season in her chosen roles.  Now I must admit that Asylum still holds the biggest place in my heart so far…  I found that Asylum’s characters, flashbacks, setting, twists and overall coherence and flow were phenomenal.  



Friggin Coven.  I had such high hopes.  Maybe that’s the problem, maybe I put too much forethought into it, but I honestly just think that this season fell flat.  Asylum was strong because of the intertwining stories and general sense of “Oh this is what the story is about.” namely, Sarah Paulson(amazing)’s character was a journalist tasked with finding out the truth behind the conditions of the mental hospital and doing whatever she could to publish the story outright.  In the end, she gets it done.  That is ROUGHLY what the season was about.  Coven is about a girl who realize she has an awful case of sexually transmitted DEATH, is sent to a boarding school for witches where she can learn to hone her craft, oh and there’s this feud between them and the Voodoo practitioners but that ends up okay…  Oh and then there are the witch hunters.  Stevie Nicks?  Oh and then Madame LaLaurie redeemed herself!  Oh but then she like…  Relapsed…  Axeman.  Frankencutie turned butler…  Previous butler being obsessed with dolls for some… stupid… bleeping reason… What?  I have no idea what this season was trying to accomplish.

And yes, you can absolutely argue with me (I don’t recommend arguing with a bunch of sentence fragments) and say that “Hey Jessie, ya big downer, Asylum had like eight different branches to the story too!  What makes them different?”  Well I’ll tell you, imaginary frenemy.  The difference is that Asylum followed ONE arc.  The bottom line of the story was that in episode one Sarah Paulson went to the hospital to investigate, and in the final episode, she wrote a friggin book about her findings all those years ago and murdered her murdering son of a murderer.  The branches of Asylum all tied up neatly in the end in a satisfying but not always happy way, and I got REALLY excited for what the next season would have in store.  Coven ended kind of abruptly, rushed, with a random “twist” that we all saw coming, and while kind of ignoring half of the rules previously stated on the show.  (In other news, I’m going to write a book called “The Branches of Asylum” because that sounded really cool when I said it out loud.)

Needless to say, I am indifferent as to how excited I will be for next season, but because I am predictable and a fan girl at heart, I imagine once they announce what next season will be about, I will jump up and down, call my sister in law and go “OH MY GOD I AM SOOOOOO EXCITED!!!” (Fair warning Sara)  

I could honestly pick apart every little thing that made me go “UGH REALLY?” about this show but it would be so long that none of you would read this, and I’m trying to work on my writing here, it would be nice if people read it sometimes.

If you read this, please enjoy a complimentary “Awww thanks, man!” <– I suggest copying this text, having it printed and then place on a plaque, or tattooed on your body… added to a shrine.

xo Jessie